Written by IainB
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Monday, 24 November 2008

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The worst weather to hit Australia since settlement by Europeans has affected the hit ITV reality show, I'm A Celebrity.

"It's not stopped raining," said Ant.

"It's like a monsoon," added Dec.

One of the two original two camps had to be abandoned when all the tents and George Takai were washed away. With all the contestants ensconced in the one camp, the one further away from the river that hadn't been there the week before, it was hoped that the show could continue. That wasn't to be.

"If anything it started raining harder," said Ant.

"Like a wet weekend in Prestatyn," added Dec.

The primary camp had to be abandoned earlier today when Ester Rantzen was found clinging to a vine with the day's trial flooded out.

The remaining contestants have been moved to a four star hotel in Canberra.

"It's not the Ritz," said Ant.

"More like a Travelodge," added Dec.

"We're hoping the lack of facilities in the hotel, such as a body temperature pool and personal masseuse will discomfort the celebrities enough to make it feel like a hardship," said Keith McTeeth, the show's producer. "We've also instructed the hotel to not leave chocolates on the pillows, and replace the standard menu with kangaroo testicles."

The trials for the celebrities are set to continue, although there will be new ones, such as "Sitting by the pool without a margaritas" and "eating a full English breakfast when it's cold".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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