Conservative Party leader, 'Do Nothing' Dave Cameron today launched a full frontal assault on governmental strategy by declaring to a packed House Of Commons that there would be no need for an alternative Tory Party strategy to Gordon Brown's borrow your way out of trouble mantra.
'Do Nothing Dave' suggested to a packed and not very appreciative House that repossessions, bankruptcies, and other such trivia could be dealt with by buying and eating biscuits, the price of which has plummeted by the aforementioned 'whopping' 18%
'It's a scientifically proven fact,' he stated, 'That calorific intake can keep one warm and essentially alive should one lose one's job, home, personal effects, self respect and wind up homeless on the street.
'So that's it. The solution is not to borrow ten billion pounds from the IMF which we might have to repay at a later date, but to gorge ourselves on biscuits-preferably Hob Nobs-and gorge our way out of recession.'
Baroness Thatcher could clearly be seen in a secret doorway licking her drooly lips and applauding generously.
So that's it then, buy biscuits.
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