Written by jeremy griffiths
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Sunday, 23 November 2008

image for Woolworth in Radical Pic 'n Mix Refinancing Plan
"Share" your Pick 'n Mix

Woolworth today announced that it's radical refinancing plan has been a huge success.
The price of Pick 'n Mix has been doubled, but each purchase qualifies for one new share per sweet item.

"We have had a huge take-up for the offer enthused a spokesman. We sell around £60 million worth of Pick 'n Mix every week, we are getting 100% take-up on the offer, We anticipate we will be fully recapitalised by the end of January, plus with our increased shareholder loyalty base we will continue to increase sales".

At a packed Pick 'n Mix counter customers enthused about the deal, "It's a bit of fun" said one, "better than the lottery" said another. One merchanr banker, stocking up on 5 kilo's of Pink Shrimps, said, "love it; it's the future"

Analysts after initial sceptism welcomed the scheme.
"With shares at under 2p. it makes perfect sense", said one broker, "they get recapitalised, loads of customer loyalty,it's brilliant".

Thorntons are said to be looking closely at the scheme.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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