Written by Jonsey
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Tuesday, 18 November 2008

image for I borrowed my way out of debt!

Gordon Brown today announced that the common belief that "two wrongs do not make a right" is actually false.

The UK has plunged itself into a debt fuelled recession following years of increasing personal debt. Many of the UK's problems were caused by low interest rates that have caused very high levels of consumer debt (in addition to thousands of London dwelling, number crunching, sweater wearing b(w)ankers). Add to the mix the fact that the stamp used on your annual pension statement is actually worth more than your pension and the good folks of Britain have been left with no choice but to borrow hundreds of thousands to buy a worthless flat next to a canal in order to retire.

Mr Brown has decided that there is only one way out of this black hole. He announced today that the United Kingdom has approached Debtbuster loans for a mortgage on the whole country.

He comments "This funding will provide us with the cash necessary to ensure that new labour absolutely destroys the United Kingdom for the next two decades or so. Most people thought that the credit crunch was the end of the line for 'growth' in the UK, however I believe that I can carry on spending this country into a prosperous stone age".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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