Written by Skoob1999
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Friday, 14 November 2008

image for Gary Glitter Conspicuously Absent From Children In Need Extravaganza
Pudsey's Brother This Morning. In A Field. We Think.

Glam rocker come convicted paedophile Gary Glitter was this evening notably absent from the Children In Need fund raising marathon, a notable BBC institution.

As the clock ticked towards eleven pm and the charity fund stood at a staggering £13 million there was no sign of Glitter.

Bob Ajob, a BBC employee said: 'It's a disgrace really. I mean, you've got this guy who's an international star, albeit an international pariah, who loves kids so much he's prepared to pay a tenner a week each for a couple of Vietnamese adolescents, and when the underprivileged kids of this country need help he's off the radar.'

Edith Plate, a BBC tea lady said: 'I'm glad he's not here, the dirty convicted kiddy fiddling bastard.'

Glitter was unavailable for comment.

Tezza, when asked about Glitters absence was heard to remark that 'If that perv shows up I'll kick the bollix off of the bastard meself so I will.'

A Vietnamese child protection officer commented: 'He not here no more. Now he your probrem.' before adding, 'Ten dollar, me love you long time.'

More as we get it.

To donate to Children In Need, log onto the BBC website.

It's a worthy cause.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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