Britain is gearing up for a mad "Supermarket Sweep" style bonanza next Friday, after the Government announced that all taxes would be abolished for 20 minutes - probably around 5.15 in the afternoon.
Within that short timeframe, anyone being paid or making purchases or inheriting money will not be charged any taxes - the latest innovative idea from the Government to kickstart the British economy.
Already, hoardes of shoppers are planning to descend on High Street stores and supermarkets to take advantage of VAT-free purchases.
However, a Treasury insider told us - "No-one will be gettng paid at 5.15 on a Friday, and no inheritances will be getting actioned either. And when was the last time anyone got through a supermarket checkout queue in under 20 minutes? Anyway, they'll end up buying tons of shit they don't need, and will spend a fortune doing it even if they don't have to pay the VAT.
"Hopefully they'll then get into debt difficulties and have to spend the rest of their lives paying off credit card bills. The banks will make huge profits off them, and we'll all be happy again. It just shows how stupid the British public are."