Zimbabwean big game hunter Clayton Le Moors finally supplied his much sought after high meat content sausages following a tense three week wait.
Three weeks is a long time to wait for a sausage order under normal circumstances, but Clayton Le Moors was adamant that the disruption to supplies was through no fault of his own. When the sausages were finally delivered to the slavering customers the verdict was pretty much unanimous.
At this point there would usually be a quote from satisfied customers but as we are governed by tight reporting restrictions from Robert Mugabe's alleged puppet government, all we can report is that customers described the long awaited sausages as delicious, and probably even better with mash and baked beans.
Or onion gravy.
Or in a roll with with ketchup and mustard.
But we mustn't use lengthy quotes to emphasise the legitimacy of a story as it would appear to imply some form of journalistic bias.
Clayton Le Moors was unavailable for comment, as was everybody else connected with this story.
In fact, apparently nobody on earth is currently available for comment.
Due to reporting restrictions.
Or possibly Ann alien invasion.