Northampton - (Seedy Ass Mess): A platinum swastika-engraved penis ring that once belonged to SS head Heinrich Himmler is going under the hammer after being discovered in a Northampton car boot sale.
The Nazi 'death head ring' as it was known was worn on all ritual ceremonies and is engraved with the Third Reich's occult insignia.
It is also embossed with the date of the 'Night of the Long Knives' and is one of only five awarded by the Fuherer himself for personal services rendered.
Auctioneers are a being a bit vague about provenance. However a number of Northampton locals claim it was given as a love token to a Mrs Doris Ribbentrop of 35 Acacia Avenue, former landlady of the Oswald Mosley Arms and a leading blogger on the Daily Mail's Femail website.
Max Mosley is stark raving bonkers.