United Kingdom - (Putrid Ass Mess): A lead article in this weekend's Daily Mail has revealed how decomposing bodies of thousands of its readers are lying around rotting because of the credit crunch fiasco.
The tabloid's innovative reader burial scheme had previously insured people from dropping dead from reading too many right wing scare stories.
But the scheme's underwriters have gone bust, leaving thousands facing massive funeral bills that have to be paid for in advance because the Labour government has nationalised lucrative undertaker contracts.
A spokesman for the National Society of Non-Aligned and Funeral Directors said today Daily Mail readers had no right to drop dead in the middle of a recession and expect a bona fide funeral paid for by the taxpayer 'some time in 2012'.
Gorgon Brown's been pissed since April.