Written by Reuman Frijj
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Thursday, 2 October 2008

image for Brown reinvents A-Team to prevent financial meltdown

Following the recent resurgence in the nation's love for all things shamelessly 80s, Prime Minister Gordon Brown has unveiled a shocking new policy in order to gain popularity among the public.

The Prime Minister's aids had been warning Mr Brown that an "emergency team" was needed in order to fight the world's monetary woes, but were flabbergasted when Mr Brown announced that a Financial A-Team was to be launched.

"I have pulled together the UK's greatest Soldiers of Fortune" the grotesque Scotsman scoffed, "Fortune being the operative word".

Inside sources have claimed that Mr Brown's team will consist of Baroness Thatcher, MC Hammer, KIT and a number of perms. Mr Brown himself is renowned for being created during the early 80s, when a bag of pork scratchings and the colour grey was dropped into a nuclear reactor.

"It's not fair" The Prime Minister, or Mr G, as he has now asked to be called, told reporters this morning. "Everything else from the 80s is getting reborn, but all I can seem to do is stumble and fall. Shit, even Queen are more popular than me. And the best thing about those tossers is that one of them is dead. Fool."

Only time will tell if Mr G's grand plan to save the economy from the back of a black van will either come together or plummet from a great height without a pair of parachute pants, but at least we can be sure it will be done with vulgarity and a synthesised backing track.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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