In scenes reminiscent of the day when ex- Daily Mirror newspaper boss Robert Maxwell was found floating in the Med under his yacht The Ghislaine, Israeli security service Mossad last night held a celebratory champagne reception at the President George H Bush Center for Intelligence (Gaza office) in response to news that their greatest alumnus Iyad Allawi had been selected by an overwhelming majority of Sunni and Shi'ia members of the Iraqi Government No-longer-in Exile as the country's new Prime Minister.
In a statement issued to commemorate the appointment, a spokesman said: "Hurray! Another Poodle is born."
The story was quickly picked up by officers of the City of London's fraud squad who immediately re-issued a 1982 photofit image of a man wanted in connection with questioning about the murder of "God's Banker" Roberto Calvi, who mysteriously hanged himself under Blackfriars Bridge after losing $400 million of the Vatican's slush fund in a game of poker which resulted in the collapse of the notorious Banco Ambrosiano and numerous hospitalizations of members of the P2 Lodge.
Meanwhile, federal investigators in Texas have confirmed that Allawi may be questioned with regard to newly-discovered offshore bank accounts in Colombia that show a direct correlation with the disappearance of $$$billions from the coffers of collapsed energy giant ENRON.
The Aga Khan is said to be unavailable for comment.