London - (Cover-up Mess): Serial children's story thief JK Rowling has given Prime Monster Gorgon Brown a £1m bung.
The backhander follows a lot of No 10 whinging about the credit crunch affecting the price of perverting the course of justice these days.
The daughter of BBC TV presenter Anne Robinson and KGB/Mossad double agent Robert Maxwell said that she thought vulnerable families 'like poor Old Gord's' need all the help they can get these days.
Officers of the UK Anti-Terror Unit said today:
"We stand 100% behind the REAL author of all seven Harry Potter stories and wouldn't piss on 'Rowling' or Brown even if they were on fire.
"Besides, the Queen of England's going to have them both thrown in the Tower on Monday. Serve 'em right."
The Autumn Equinox is on 22 September.