Written by Monkey Woods
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Topics: Kids, Farting, Fire

Wednesday, 20 August 2008

image for Arse Fire Causes Pounds Worth Of Damage
Fart-lighting can be dangerous

A 12-year-old boy has been taken to hospital with horrific burns after blowing up a petrol can whilst breaking wind.

The accident happened in the Black Country town of Tipton, near Dudley, where the boy, along with his cousin, was having a Fart-lighting Competition.

The victim, who had been in the gold medal position, wound up for one of his special gut-busting efforts, and as he expelled the air from his anus, a flame shot across the garden engulfing trees, shrubs and flowers, as well as the two boys and the house.

A fire crew rushed from nearby Tipton Fire Station when they heard the blast, and the boy's arse was extinguished within minutes.

Watch Commander Paul Harpin said:

"He's got 18% burns and a sore ringpiece. Our advice is to get in touch with your local Fire Station if you plan to hold Fart-lighting Events. We have lots of advice leaflets available which tell you how to hold these events safely."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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