London - (Fetid Ass Mess): "This Government's got the Balls if Giltter's got the spunk for the job," a Department for Children, Schools & Families source has said today.
The announcement follows news that Downing Street's Blairforce One has picked up Garry Glitter from Vietnam's Thu Duc prison and is enroute to London where the Welcome Home mat has been dusted down outside Ed Balls' ministry.
Balls, 69, is rumored to want to sign up 'totally reformed character' Glitter as a special adviser on child protection issues.
Glitter, real name Paul Gadd, has finished serving a three year jail sentence after outraging pubic decency with his hideous shaving brush-themed goatee beard.
His defence lawyer once said that the hairy protruberance is the real bone of contention among his detractors who started a vendetta against the ageing rocker soon after he began pencilling in his over-plucked eyebrows.
All's well that ends well, then....eh?