Written by Steddyeddy
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Monday, 18 August 2008

image for New judge for X Factor
Simon Cow, the presenter of X-Factor in Goa

Hot on the heels of the news that the pretty girl with the Scouse accent, you know, whats-her-face married to the football chappie, might quit the judges of the new season of X-Factor, thus forfeiting a huge pay cheque and the chance to help fix-it for some warbler to make Simon Cowell even richer, is the news that a new judge is waiting in the wings.

Emm Dee Eff, a rapper who has been compared to a piece of MFI 4x2, mainly because it IS a piece of MFI 4x2, has been rumoured to be ready and willing, with permission from his father, an MFI self-assembly kitchen cupboard, to take up the position as the 4th judge of X-Factor.

Emm Dee Eff is of course highly qualified to be an X-Factor judge. As a rapper, it is completely tone deaf and is able to point its finger in the air for prolonged periods without tiring, in time to completely tuneless thumping which sounds very much like an un-taxed car being crushed.

Fellow rapper, Mi Tee Bludd Dee Rakkete said: "I never knew, man, like, innit that the crucial Emm Dee Eff, innit, was, like, wood, innit. Crucial. Happening. Innit. Mighty."

Entertainer Cilla Black, taking a break from filming excruciating advertisements for useless insurance policies was said to be devastated.

"This was the one lorra lorra opportunity for my friend whats-her-face, who is a lorra lorra brilliant singer, to represent Liverpool on Saturday prime-time telly.

"I hope Emm Dee Eff is from a Merseyside branch of MFI, otherwise I'm off up to the Crem to tell our Bobby all about it."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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