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Saturday, 12 July 2008

image for Big Brother's Belinda Kicked Out For Racist Abuse
Mario switches to Turkish following the failure of Italian

Big Brother's irritating nasal jazz fraud Belinda (Belinda, Belinda) has been kicked out of the house following allegations of racist abuse levelled by mock-Italian Mario Marconi, real name Cyril Twaddlethorpe, from Manchester.

Mario, who doubles as a Buzz Lightyear lookalike, likes to pretend he is a musclebound, tanned Latino of Italian extract instead of a boring w*nker from Lancashire. He was evicted on Friday by a crowd of women bored by his "Italian Stallion does Health and Safety" routine.

Following his eviction Mario spoke to the shows producers about what he described as Belinda's constant racist abuse. Belinda was described as having said "Doo Wop" on 47 different occasions and "showaddy waddy dooby wop" on 59 seperate occasions. Mario also claimed she walked past him singing "woppdy wop wop wop" on 4 occasions and "dum dum dum de wop" on 1 occasion.

He also claimed she said "Scooby Dooby Doo" in front of Mikey, who looks like Shaggy from Scooby Doo, but this complaint was not upheld as Mikey can't see what he looks like anyway.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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