Written by Gordon Bennet
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Topics: Men, sperm, shortage

Friday, 27 June 2008

image for World Sperm Bank in Crisis as Giant Storage Freezer Breaks Down
Many mens preferred choice of reading while amusing themselves

Yesterday in Geneva a spokesman for the World Sperm Bank Dr Dick Cumalott announced that a Giant Freezer stored at St. Peters Hospital had defrosted in the middle of night meaning that several million gallons of Love Juice had been irreparably damaged by the accidental failure.

Dr Dick said "we appreciate that is upsetting news for all the men concerned so we will be offering the appropriate counselling with our Specialist Consultant Dr Felix Handjob."

The Doctor then added "we where already facing a crisis due to a shortage of Donors meaning that most of our main suppliers where recording fully depleted stocks."

It is understood that this problem had been staring most people particularly women in the face as new legislation meant that from last month all Donors has to give their real name and address.

This of course stopped many men from anonymously visiting a Clinic and pleasuring himself while staring at pictures of Maria Sharapova before enjoying a cup of tea and a biscuit while being paid £25.00 for the pleasure.

Figures from the Human Fertilisation and Yankalott Authority (HFYA) showed that 93% of men had refused to come or where not coming quick enough when required.

Dr Ivor Hardon a spokesman for HFYA said the Authority was well aware of the difficulties and that a solution would be sought whereby men would be fully rewarded in future by being assisted by a dusky nubile Hand Maiden.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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