Police have launched a massive nationwide hunt following the announcement that the skeleton of Britain's most notorious criminal mastermind Reggie Kray has escaped from a London cemetery and was last seen hitchhiking to Cornwall.
Scotland Yard Chief Len Quilby says the discovery was made early this morning by a cemetery worker who fell into the uncovered grave shortly after being accosted by the arch villain.
"I was just walking along when "Whack!" someone hit me over the head and stole my lunch.Then the next thing I remember was the sound of bones clattering" said grave digger Earl Bailey "It had to be Reggie"
Police sniffer dogs have been called in and road blocks set up within a five kilometre radius of the cemetery.A sketch of what Kray now looks like has also been circulated.
"He looks a lot different to what he used to" claims Inspector Quilby "a bit thinner you know"
Warnings have also been issued to the general public.
"If anyone does see a skeleton standing by the side of the road eating someone's lunch we recommend police be contacted immediately" urged Inspector Quilby "this man is very dangerous and according to our coroner probably pretty smelly as well"