Drowning Street - (Ass Mess): UK prime Monster Gorgon Brown faces an imminent wipe out in a criminal bankruptcy lawsuit for the settlement of over £250 billion of his predecessor's IRA Piss Process debts.
Tony Blair's fetid deal with the assorted ragbag of disaffected molesters who banded together under the IRA flagship of convenienece has slowly fallen apart.
Treasury mandarins have calculated that the total asset base of Monarchial Crown Estate-related asstets which Blair authorised to be liquidated in his ten year Drowning Street garage boot sale exceeds the entire market value of UK oil giant BP.
One third of the revenue raised came from straightforward Provisional IRA deals connected to doshing up and empowering former child molester inmates who served jail time with Blair in the early 1970s before reinventing themslves as freedom fighters.
Another third of the revenue is sourced directly to Al-Qaeda type of foreign terrorists who changed tack from sex crimes to grand larceny after finding bribery of the British Government to be a relative sinch.
The remaining 33% relates to second and third generation of cold war fascists who rapidly became self-invented Russian oligarchs after getting the nod from their digusting C-in-C Boris Yeltsin.
"We give Gorgon Brown until mid week," a Serious & Disorganised Crime Agency source promised, "and then Wham! it's straight in the slammer with all the front benches."
Alistair Campbell is a sucker for punishment.