Written by ScottThe Dot
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Topics: Police, Strike

Wednesday, 21 May 2008

image for Police investigate theft of pay rise
Off to McDonalds for lunch

Police up and down the country are investigating the disappearance of 0.6% of their pay. Normally sedentary officers appear to now be highly motivated to solve this particular crime because it affects them directly.

A spokesman for the Police Federation said "Whilst it is true that we generally don't care when an ordinary citizen gets burgled and have their stuff stolen, what people don't realise is that this time WE are the victims. It is very different."

"In this case we can't just say 'I'm sorry we won't be able to catch whoever did this' and 'Best to just make an insurance claim' then go off for doughnuts. We have to act. I might not be able to afford a third holiday next year if we don't find this stolen 0.6%"

A government spokesman responded "They did nothing when I was mugged. See how they like it."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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