London - (Bare Ass Mess): The antics of thousands of naked dyslectic women riding bareback through London's traditional spring sonking bites have been branded as a crude display of cunning stunts.
The wannabe Lady Godivas have been protesting about Royal Parks' heavy-handedness after scores of naked women were clamped for dress code violations following the introduction of new recreational nudity policies.
These ban partial nudity near the mosque, children's playgrounds and the American ambassador's residence.
Warnings about the new regulations were posted last month in the form of a braille smallprint addition on parks' Welcome! boards.
At the first sign of a heatwave, however, hundreds of warmth-starved sunseekers soon stripped off to enjoy their lunch-hours au naturel.
Meanwhile in a shrubby part of the park two dozen dress code enforcement officers were poised to swoop after half an hour of intensive long-distance camcorder-assisted probes.
The park's clamping unit then pounced and manacled some fifty nubile topless natural leggy 18-25 year-old blondes for daring to bare their loveliness so brazenly in pubic.
Today's bareback horse riding protest is within the letter of the law, however, as only partial nudity is now deemed an offence within the royal open space precincts.