Written by Scott Nairns
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Friday, 16 May 2008

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Did I Tell You The One About....

If you were folically challenged, overweight, and specky, with no job, no social life, you'd think you'd just take a handful of pills, but not Hector Bracegirdle (58), who has managed to scoop the coveted, 'Worst Comedian Of The Year Award' at Blackpool's coveted cabaret rooms!

Hector almost never made this years pilgrimage from Montrose, Scotland as his 1989 Lada estate veered off the motorway and he was stranded until a nice AA man (a very nice man!), towed him the 25 miles so he could perform.

"I was nervous, as last year someone laughed at my knock-knock jokes and no laughing is allowed. This year I went with impressions of my hero's, Frank Carson; Jimmy Cricket; Julian Clary and Sooty and they worked a treat," Hector grinned.

For 30 minutes, Hector silenced the crowd and one by one the hall emptied, beating last years record by just 12 seconds, set by Ruby Wax.

Hector won a weeks holiday for two at Ronald and Agnes's Guest House, but had no-one to go with until Ruby Wax grabbed his arm and agreed to join him.

Ronald and Agnes won't be offering the prize next year.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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