Written by Angus McFiddle
Print this
Topics: School, Teachers, Exams, SATs

Monday, 12 May 2008

image for SATS tests are too taxing, says teacher

Standard Assessment Tests (SATs) are too difficult, say Britain's teachers, who struggle to mark the papers.

The national union has called for the scrapping of all exams for children under 10 because of the pressure they put on teachers.

"We really struggle to mark the exams, because we don't know the answers," said teaching spokesperson Tory Spelling. "When we went to school, no one corrected our spelling, made us do our homework or taught us to add up without using our fingers, so why should we be expected to know the answers to these exams?

"How can we mark the papers if we don't know what marks to give? Not only that, we struggle to add up the number of questions the children have got right."

Ted Todd, a junior minister at the Department for Children, Schools and Families, said it is a disgrace that teachers are not clever enough to teach children. "Something should be done," he said, "to ensure that today's children do not grow up to be tomorrow's stupid and uneducated teachers."

The Government has promised to ensure Britain does not have any stupid teachers by the end of 2018, because by then it will have scrapped education completely to save money.

Make Angus McFiddle's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 4 plus 5?

4 9 16 19
44 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more