Written by Sophie Jayne
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Monday, 5 May 2008

image for World War 3 Is Nigh, According To Radders Anyway
Get your bombs ready.

I have a strong suspicion that Daniel Radcliffe is on something, possibly a white powder substance, because he has done it again. Once again he has said something so outrageous that those closest to him fear for his sanity.

"I am going to be the next Hitler!" He told us "Yeah, I should rule the world because I have lots of money and I am uber sexy, so I thought I might declare war on the world, it will be wonderful fun!"

Gordon Brown and the rest of the leaders of the free world however seemed unaffected by this threat though. "Like we are going to believe the word of a hysterical child, the closest that boy will get to ruling the world will be bossing his personal shopper around!" said Brownie.

As an annoyingly over obsessed girl with an addictive personality, I read more into Radcliffe's comments than the world leaders and therefore took it upon myself to sneak into Radder's basement where I found him with his chemistry set making a nuclear bomb. I knew it was a bomb, because it was clearly labelled with big bold letters. I made a swift exit then, because contrary to popular belief I don't have a death wish.

So, yes I confirm World War 3 is upon us, so all I have left to say is get your bombs ready.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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