Written by queen mudder
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Topics: Police, Prison, May Day

Tuesday, 29 April 2008

image for 50,000 police cells going begging for massive May Day bust
This one's reserved for Cherie, Madonna, Kate Middleton and Amy Whorehouse

London - (Rioters): Up to 50,000 empty, brand new police cells are said to be 'going begging' ahead of a huge May Day coup d'etat that will see the feckless republican dictatorship of Prime Monster Gorgon Brown shackled behind bars, according to reports.

"We've waited ages to nail these douchebags," a top Met source said today, "after they reneged on our 2% pay deal last September."

A top MoD source confirmed that the military's grievances are also substantial after years of dodgy equipment, a sordid part-time Defence Secretary boss, risible work conditions and squalid, rat-infested barracks.

"We're in it too," Brig Geb Aynsley Smythe said today.

Meanwhile Whitehall spooks are also said to be close to the brink after yet another Russian oligarch mobster was given immunity from prosecution over London's 7/7 bombings.

"Now he's planning on building a fucking great big £200 million mansion for himself and his rentboys, right in the middle of bloody Trafalgar Square!" one MI5 bigwig fumed today.

May Day, or the feast of Beltane as the Pagans would have it, traditionally marks the start of summer.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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