Written by Jesus Budda
Print this

Tuesday, 22 April 2008

image for Children Of Rich People Are Stupid B*stards
This is how stupid f*cking rich fools change their pants

Its official: the children of wealthy folk are incredibly stupid and ignorant. So say statisticians at Cambridge University, England who have concluded a five-year study into the intelligence of the spawn of rich bastards.

"97 % of these ignorant rich f*ckers are clinically brain-dead", said Ivor Lott of the University's intelligence department, "the remaining 3% are either hopelessly thick or simply mentally inferior to a cow".

In the comprehensive study, the Professor took a cross section of societies wealthy and questioned their offspring.

"Aristocrats, Entrepreneurs, and Business and Media people's children were asked to perform a few simple tasks", said the Prof, "For instance, Prince William was instructed to make a sandwich. Instead he stuck a helicopter propeller blade up his bottom and went to his girlfriend's house.

"The ginger one was worse. He put his penis in his mouth, dressed like Hitler and rode around naked on his grandmother".

Children of rock stars were also pretty f*cking stupid too.

"Mick Jaggers children were asked to go upstairs and fetch a silver spoon", said the Prof, "they couldn't do it and said that they could only walk down runways at fashion shows - and even at that, only if they were paid $10 thousand".

A study into the spouses of rich bastards is now under way and it is expected to show that the wives and husbands of the wealthy are stupid, ignorant pricks who do nothing but organize charity events, attend book launches and wear ponchos.

Make Jesus Budda's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 3 multiplied by 5?

6 15 19 21
28 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more