Written by Tony Eagleton
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Topics: Bank of England

Tuesday, 22 April 2008

image for Bank of England Denies Rewarding Reckless Lenders
King: "How much d'ya need, mate?"

Governor of the Bank of England, Mervyn King, today denied that its recent initiative to free up the financial markets amounted to a bail out of the very institutions responsible for creating the problems.

The arrangement involves swapping valuable Treasury bills for less liquid assets held by hard hit banks.

"The intruments we will accept in exchange for Treasury bills are perfectly good assets," said King in response to concerns that the tax payer would be left with increased risk as a result of the initiative.

"There is nothing risky about a the value of a second hand Ford Cortina and we are very grateful to RBS for securitising a half chewed toffee and a blackie's egg."

"This is merely about improving liquidity" said King. "Hic!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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