Angus, Scotland - (Off-With-Her-Head Mess): Tayside Police have finally identified the woman whose head "and two left feet" were found on a beach at Carnoustie.
The news follows reports of a landslide at Birkhall on the Balmoral Estate, 69 miles to the north in Crathie, Ballater, which may have disturbed "some highly secretive Scottish lairds' graves."
"At this stage we can confirm the woman actually died a long time ago, in a Luftwaffe bombing of Hyde Park, central London, circa September 1940," Sgt Jimmy MacBergerac of Brechin Police said today.
"Wartime archives confirm she was a terrible dancer - hence the at-first-bizarre discovery of the two left feet found nearby on the Carnoustie foreshore."
Police have obtained an exhumation warrant and are heading to Birkhall armed with heavy-duty bulldozers and over a dozen sniffer dogs on secondment from deployment at Jersey's Haut de la Garenne site.
An update is expected later in the week.