Written by queen mudder
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Tuesday, 1 April 2008

image for Madonna behind secret £50 million Topcrack Mansion purchase for Britney
Madonna behind the secret £50 million house deal for Britney?

London - (Real Estate Mess): Madonna has emerged as the shadowy secret wheeler-dealer behind Hampstead Garden Suburb's £50 million price tag gin palace, Topcrack Mansion.

But the real owner is believed to be Britney Spears after a series of nifty offshore tax haven deals between the two singers late last year squirreled away assets from pesky K-Fed and divorce court sleuths.

Britney has long been rumored to be planning on doing a runner from troublesome LA child custody arrangements.

And Madonna may have paved the way for a possible transatlantic runner later this year.

Previous news stories had attributed the North London house purchase to some Kazakhstani hooker pal of Mikhail Gorbachev.

These have now proved to be rubbish.

The sprawling Bishops Avenue mansion's new owner was revealed at the weekend when a builder's tarpaulin awning blew away from the portico revealing a 50ft x 4 ft gold-embossed Britney Palace house name.

"We think she's moving in sometime around June," locals said today, "just as soon as she's ditched that loony conservatorship thingy from her Pa's itchy little mitts."

Guy Ritchie is 69.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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