Written by IN SEINE
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Tuesday, 18 March 2008

image for That Bakewell Tart!
Top Bun Cheesy Bakes

The BBC have announced what they hope will be the icing on the cake, as a murder mystery will grace the small screens around Christmas. The film, called 'A Matter of Loaf and Death', will be a cross between One Man and his Dog and Ready Steady Cook, yet not a sheep, wellies, coloured bloke or baking tin will be seen.

The scene is set at a bread factory in Lancaster which is owned by world famous inventor Wallace and his long-suffering hound Gromit. They begin producing all kinds of bread, associated with cheese. However, it is not long before our intrepid hero falls for his next door neighbour, a prostitute from Derby, called Piella DeVille, the original Bakewell Tart.

The Bakery Business, called Top Bun is extremely successful and working flat out with a new 'Bread-o-matic' machine complete with a slicer which can cut 4 loaves at a time; know as a Four Loaf Cleaver which became a runner-up in 'Dragon's Den'.

The hapless Wallace falls for the charms of Piella, who being an employee, asks him for a rise. From then on all the work is left to poor Gromit who has been working like a … well… a dog.

Oscar winning creator, Nick Park told In Seine News;

"I'm thrilled to create this story and no doubt there will be lots of new merchandise to accompany it such as dog biscuits. I would like to assure our viewers that no animals were hurt in the making of this film and rumours that are circulating on the Internet about Piella having a bun in the oven are simply untrue!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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