Written by carina-eta
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Topics: Cooking, Delia Smith

Saturday, 16 February 2008

image for Delia Smith's 'How To Cheat At Cooking' Slammed By Critics
Delia- Good Egg or a bit Hard Boiled?

The new cookery book by recently canonised football manager Delia Smith has been slammed by critics and fellow celebrity chefs as "immoral".

In her new book, which is eggspected to fly off the shelves and earn Delia a further sainthood and possibly an O.B.E for services to basic ingredients, she has suggested using MacDonalds Burgers for children's parties, KFC chicken zinger nuggets to serve to guests as "finger foods" and Iceland Party Packs as Christmas Dinner.

Fellow chefs Ivor Novelli and Aynsley Harriott have slammed Delia for "daring to promote fast foods" to compete with their own "slam in the microwave" ranges and "boil in the bag" soups.

Also heavily criticised is the Chapter entitled, "Getting an Edge by Slaughtering Rival Chefs" in which Delia reveals several tactics for getting rid of Jamie Oliver and Gordon Ramsay. The chapter has already prompted it's own cult-status website with over 400,000 members signing up in the first few days.

Delia herself has commented, "No-one really does all that bl**dy cooking, are you mad? Slaving away all day over a hot stove, just buy it pre-packed, no-one will know the difference, the Nation's palates are dead zones anyway."

Kerry Katona was today said to be furious after Delia was offered her much-coveted Iceland adverts, "Well that's my livelihood up sh*t creek", she commented, "I'll be back on the streets by Wednesday."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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