Written by Simon Cockle
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Thursday, 14 February 2008

image for Warrant issued for arrest of entire population of world after Diana coroner remarks "we are all to blame for her death"
"We are all to blame"

A warrant was issued for the arrest of the entire population of the world last night after Lord Justice Scott Baker remarked that the death of Princess Diana was a tragedy where "no-one is innocent".

In what is seen as one of the most remarkable legal events in history, the coroner went on to say "we are all to blame" and asked all the police forces of the world to arrest the entire population of Earth, including himself.

The death of Princess Diana, in 1997, has been under scrutiny since October 2007 when an inquest into the car crash that killed her was initiated to find out, once and for all, who was responsible. With Lord Justice Scott Baker's ruling, it appears the world now has its answer.

The process began around midnight when the populations of the Home Counties were asked to remain indoors under house arrest. This will continue today as East Anglia, the Midlands and South East England begin their first day's incarceration.

Internationally, the US has taken the lead, with much of New England now behind bars. France has gone on the run and Australia is hiding in the outback. Eventually, the police forces of the world, it is envisaged, will turn themselves in, leaving all 6 billion inhabitants of the planet in custody.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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