Written by Simon Cockle
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Topics: Gordon Brown

Thursday, 31 January 2008

image for Gordon Brown "has only one head"
The one on the right is missing.

Despite seeming to lead an ordinary existence, it is not common knowledge that, as a result of a schoolboy rugby game, Gordon Brown only has one head. Like many people with the same affliction, the Prime Minister has managed to hide his disability successfully.

The Prime Minister, who was educated at Kirkcaldy High School, lost his other head when he injured it during a rugby match. The head was damaged and had to be removed. Now though, it is difficult for many to recognise that he only has one head. "I didn't realise that," said Jane Petri-Dish, 27, of Brighton. "He doesn't draw attention to it. By pointing at the space."

Gavin Racist-Woods, a spokesman for the One Head Society, said, "Many people can lead relatively normal lives with only one head. Cooking, shopping, driving and running a Western democracy are all within the reach of a Uni-headed person."

Gordon Brown joins other public figures such as Ken Livingstone, Davina McCall and Jeremy Clarkson who all, amazingly, have only one head. They should not be confused with Kate Moss, who has given her head away on many occasions.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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