Written by Everyman
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Thursday, 31 January 2008

image for David Beckham dropped after Capello linguistic confusion
David Beckham is dropped due to poor spelling

David Beckham has not been selected for Fabio Capello's first match in charge of the England team, meaning he is still one cap short of the magical hundred. But it seems that David's omission is more due to Capello's limited English than a lack of form from the talented midfielder.

According to sources close to Capello's management team, the italian asked his advisers what they thought of Beckham. Unfortunately, Capello's 'B' is not dissimilar to his 'P' and the advisers thought he was referring to troubled South East London area, Peckham. The reply he received was: "violent, dirty, in need of development and regarded as a bit of a joke these days."

Capello looked shocked, thinking that this could not be the player he knew at Real Madrid - but it got worse. One adviser said: "In this country Peckham means only fools and horses."

Missing the cultural reference, Capello understood that David Beckham was an idiot who was mixed up with whores.

The manager made his announcement in his faltering English :"Given all I have learned about Beckham recently I believe there his no place for him in a squad of mine, I will not be giving him his 100th cat."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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