Peter Hain, the disgraced former Secretary for Work & Pensions, and for Wales, is no longer a disgrace, according to PM Gordon Brown, and has been selected for a post at the new Department for Misplaced Confidence. Mr Hain will also head a group provisionally called the Confusion Committee.
Hain, who is being investigated by the police, with regard to his financial dealings, was sacked from the government yesterday, but, in the true political tradition of 'looking after your old mates', was today reinstated by Mr Brown, and knotted-up his pink tie once more.
"I have not done anything wrong", said Hain, adding, "I thought my staff had done their jobs of notifying the proper authorities of the huge donations made to me in support of my pointless challenge for the Deputy leadership. My misplaced confidence in them makes me a perfect choice for this position."
Other new departments were also unveiled today, including the Department for Unsafe Storage of Information and Personal Details, the Ministry of Lies, and a Think Tank which will try to discover what, exactly, was the purpose of the Progressive Policy Forum which was set up by Mr Hain, possibly to 'handle mail'.
The former Secretary for Wales apologised to citizens of that country by saying:
"I think it's despicable that those nasty little Japanese fellows are hounding them as they are. I hope my successor will do a better job than I did of protecting them."