Written by Riaz Ali
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Topics: clothing

Wednesday, 5 September 2001

image for Tailor says 'Job Just Doesn't Suit!'
It just doesn't suit me anymore.

Yesterday, a tailor in Gloucester proclaimed loudly, "Whoops! There go my pants!" before becoming sombre and moodily whispering, "This job doesn't suit me any more."

The "pants" mishap was said to have shaken him greatly. I asked him why:

"Well," he said, "I didn't measure up to the job. I just couldn't cut it. I was just in it for the material gain."

I showed him a picture of a duck.

"That's a duck," he observed.

It was clear that the tailor, Mr. Geoff Moss, was close to edge.

"I've got no real ties," he said. "There's nothing to keep me here, sew help me God."

We walked towards a very short pier.

"Time for a long walk," I said taking his arm.

I came back an hour later for the rest of him.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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