Written by carina-eta
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Wednesday, 9 January 2008

image for Police Use Excessive Violence Against Violent Football Hooligans
Beyonce and Tyson O'Hooligan learn daddys hobby

Police yesterday stormed the homes of violent football hooligans, trashing flimsy council front doors across the country in a bid to put Britons worst off-pitch offenders being bars for a few hours.

In dawn raids across the U.K, armed police in riot gear and helmets smashed through estates, kicked in doors and maced slumbering hooligans before dragging them screaming from their beds and throwing them into waiting police vans.

A Midlands copper, speaking through his helmet and riot shield said yesterday,"We want to show these violent thugs that being violent is not the way forward, that if they are violent at matches we will find them and drag them from their homes in an unnecessary display of excessive force."

A hooligan commented as he was dragged past, eyes streaming and nose bloodied,"Woo-hoooooooo, it's just like the Man United-Arsenal match of '98, get 'em, get 'em!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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