Meddling Brussels MEP's have astonished all of Europe by suggesting that in future the future Christmas will be decided by a referendum in the coming years.
Kurt Schmurt, has tabled the motion because he is fed up with not getting the presents that he wants every year. The troubled pan-European parliamentarian and MEP told us:
"How voud you feel if you were looking forward to a new iPod and all you got was a manky MP3 player from Argos? And not even a goot vun. I'm talking about 156mb. Hardly enough to store one bloody CD!
I'm making this stand for that sad little boy in Munich and all other sad little boys throughout Europe. If this motion is carried zen zer vill be no more Christmas"
But high street retailer Argos has hit back saying:
"What next? Bananas that are only one shade of yellow and our proud British tradition of Panto scuppered?
It's the thin end of the wedge is this lad and 'appen if we let these Euro-nutters away wi' it then there'll be hell t't pay tha knows?"
Bungling PM, Gordon Brown, was last night distancing himself from the row and commented:
"Here no! Don't ask me about this or I'm liable to make another cock up. Can't we talk about Tony Blair or something? What about my record as chancellor?"