April 1 is to be the UK's first National Gay Day. The new public holiday has been announced by the Days Off and Sickies Committee of the Government's Environment Agency.
The first Gay Day will be marked by a parade past London's Cenotaph in drag, expected to be attended by Prime Monster Gordon (Tourettes) Brown wearing a new gown designed for the occasion by international couturier George at ASDA.
A simultaneous parade will take place at the new Glasgow Tower, where luminaries will include Mario Conti, Archbishop of Glasgow and Dame Edna Everidge.
The day is intended to celebrate and raise awareness of homosexuality, with schools and workplaces all over the country asking pupils and staff to cross dress.
It will also be a special "coming out" day for hundreds of closet queens that had previously been too shy to admit their sexuality.
Gay Day is expected to coincide with the unveiling of the newly designed Union Flag, incorporating the Welsh Dragon, the Islamic star & crescent and the St George's Cross replaced in pink.
Peter Tatchell of gay campaigning group Outrage! has welcomed National Gay Day, although he is not yet sure what to wear. He has told TheSpoof.com that Outrage! will provide wholehearted support by using it, "to out 15 MP's and 4 members of the Royal family".