Today the American President publicized that he received a secret briefing giving details that Princes Beatrice of York has been feeling wet for Prince Williams for a long time and is asking if Prince Williams was interested in her.
Beatrice is said to be luring Williams with her un-torn virtues.
The President complains that in the past too many first born royals in line to the thrown have desired to bestow birth to Kings produced as the result of incestuous relationships.
The President of the United States then yanked out a long list of cousins who have married into the royal family, producing what he calls "the twin paradox" because they all look similar. The list starts with Diana and continues from there.
Beatrice's mother Sarah Margaret Ferguson was asked by reporters what she thought about the American President's opinion of Beatrice's sexual desires.
Sarah Ferguson replied to reporters that she did not agree with absurd opinions. Ferguson then said, "Beatrice is extremely young and needs a mature man with an elongated worldly experience to help guide her through life." Sara Ferguson also added that the passion in such a marriage would never end due to the fact it is seen as illegal.
The Prime Minister, in the defense of the royal family, added to the media coverage by saying "It is well known the royals have always desired children of a pure royal lineage."