British paedophiles heading to Thailand will in the future be housed in 'special holiday camps' currently being built by Thai developers.
The camps, easily able to accommodate at least 5000 'guests', will claim to pander to all of the 'needs' of the average sexual deviant who just can't leave children alone, but will be run by the notorious Thai Corrections Department.
Paul Cornelius Jones from Cardiff became the latest British subject to be arrested for paedophilia in Bangkok yesterday, after 74-year-old Alan Mawson was accused last week of sexually abusing a 14-year-old boy there.
Another man, Canadian Christopher Neil, was arrested after his scrambled picture was unscrambled by police in Germany.
Camp commandant Pol Lt Suchinda Sadist told Press officers that facilities included whipping inmates with leather flails, gang-batoning, bludgeonry, and his personal favourite, hanging guests from trees by their testicles.
He had, he said, consulted with noted British expert and amateur social commentator Donkey Wooms, who had told him:
"Chop their cocks off!"