Pensham, Avon Vale - (Acrimonious Mess): Camilla's £300-a-snip London hairdresser Daniel Galvin Jr has been branded a rabid nutter by disgruntled neighbors who told a judge on Friday that the posturing egomaniacal coiffure is "like a little Hitler trying to invade everywhere."
"Well that should suit his current royal family clients very well," was the unexpected reply, "given that the Duchess of Cornwall's paternal grandfather was the Nazi traitor Von Ribbentrop.
"And that her blood-father is the Hellfire Club & Tory Grandee Sir Geoffrey 'Mogadon-Man' Howe!" learned counsel added, nodding sagely.
Standing in the dock Galvin Jr admitted escalating a land-grab property war with his neighbors the Bury brothers and going hammer and curling tong against them to snatch back a ten foot wide piece of arable track.
David and Richard Bury have testified that Galvin Jr "is a complete nutter, a toss-pot full of steaming cow-shit, a living nightmare and just like a rabid dog."
Pleasantries aside, the Bury's yesterday won substantial compensation from the dodgy hairdresser after the court found him guilty of shooting at the brothers with his air rifle, hurling rocks at their tractor shattering their windows and sabotaging their crops.
Speaking to reporters after the trial David Bury said:
"He's behaved like a right thug, regardless of whose bloody royal hair he sees to.
"Mind you, judging what Camilla ends up looking after forking out hundreds of quid for her weekly makeover at his salon, I'd say he's more into demanding money with menaces from his clients that actually doing anything trichological for them."