Connaught Square - (Disaster Mess): Ex-UK Prime Monster Tony Blair has signed a £6 million gagging order for his personal hagiography which publisher Radon House want to issue early next year.
The news comes amid reports that the FBI is closing in on the smarmy little tosser who last year ordered the Halloween plutonium 210 trick or treat treatment on ex-KGB turncoat Alexander Litvinenko.
The Russian had allegedly threatened to out him as a psychotic escapee from a 1970s Broadmoor control order and Cherie as the demented daughter of Margaret Thatcher and massive Labour swindler/ex-Mossad double agent Robert Maxwell RIP.
Blair is desperate for the dosh to pay off accumulated gambling debts that Cherie ran up by punting on a disastrous Trifecta predicting her own elevation to the House of Lords this year, a blazing hot summer with temperatures exceeding 35 degrees for 30 consecutive days and a 33-1 England Rugby victory against the Ozzies.
The gagging order will see a child-friendly memoir published on St Valentine's Day next year "with all mention of the nasty bit excised out forever" according to a source.
The slim tome will be a snip at £50 and will make no reference to his 1990 vasectomy, or the biological parentage of his last offspring, young Lucky Leo, son of cash-for-honors tosser Sir Chris 'Bung' Evans.
David Blunkett is under sedition.