Written by Mister Meaner
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Wednesday, 10 October 2007

image for Suicide Bomber Was Mistaken For An Electrician, Jury Told
Don't the coppers know an electrician when they see one?

Hussein Osman, the man police were looking for when they accidentally shot to pieces Jean Charles de Menezes on a London Tube train, was, himself, the victim of mistaken identity, it has been claimed.

Mr Osman, the suicide bomber with a plan to kill thousands of innocent people with big bombs, has claimed through intermediaries, that, at the same time Mr de Menezes was having most of his head removed by over-enthusiastic policemen at Stockwell, he was assumed to be an electrician.

Osman, walking past a firm of electricians in central London, was approached by a man in overalls who asked him where he'd been, handed him a bag of tools, and sent him to Bethnal Green to fix an old lady's kitchen socket.

Terrorist Osman told the man, who turned out to be Mr de Menezes works supervisor Tom Sparks, that he was on his way to plant a bomb, but Mr Sparks just laughed at this.

"I thought he'd been out on the piss," the jovial supervisor told the jury at the Old Bailey yesterday.

"Mr Sparks lackadaisical attitude in not establishing the identity of the man he was sending out to fix the socket, probably cost the life of an innocent Brazilian man," the Court was told.

The trial at the Old Bailey is expected to last forever.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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