Terrorists from the group Al Boredo fighting for longer school holidays for school teachers have kidnapped fifty 4x4 drivers from outside their school and taken them hostage.
The man behind this plot is thought to be the terrorist group leader Burin Bastardedo, and his deputies El Span Kum and Tumuch Timeoff.
Chief Inspector Dick Head of the local constabulary warned these men are known to be dangerous and can bore a classroom unconscious in minutes.
A spokesman from this group demanded a 10 million pound ransom fee, longer school holidays, chocolate biscuits in the staffroom and for anyone caught calling them boring to face the ultimate punishment which is to be forced to live in Wales.
If their demands are not met they are threatening to release one hostage every hour on the hour from noon tomorrow until the ransom money is paid.