Written by Paul Deacon

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Thursday, 5 July 2001

image for Urgent Product Recall

Environmental health chiefs were urgently placing product recall advertisements around the countryside last night after a haystack in Kent was found to contain a needle.

It was discovered by courting couple Ann Jeffries and Mike Scott when Mr Scott rolled over and impaled his leg. The haystack was removed from Mr Scott's bedroom in Maidstone and examined by forensic scientists. It was found to contain fragments of a steel needle which could have been laying there undiscovered for up to two years.

Anyone who has bought a haystack in the last two years is advised to return it to the point of purchase.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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