Written by Mister Meaner
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Thursday, 27 September 2007

image for Fly In Soup Taken Off Menu At French Bistro
Soup's off!

A French bistro in North London has removed one of the items from its menu after it received several complaints from customers, who ignorantly called it "disgusting".

'Fly In Soup', a rare Gallic delicacy, has always been a favourite amongst French expatriate diners at the unnamed restaurant, but British patrons, who are much more discerning in their tastes, have boycotted the soup, and time has been called on it.

Owner Alain Merde told customers that, as of maintenant:

"Soup's off!"

French people routinely scoff flies along with frogs, snails, slugs, dogs and even their own faeces, and Mr Merde cannot understand the revulsion English people show for finer continental foods.

"Ze British are so snobbish," he said, with a wave of his hand, adding "zey don't know what's good for zem."

Environment Agency officials raided the bistro last week and, to their horror, found several mesh cages full of swarming flies, which, the owner told them would have been used in the preparation of his Soup Of The Day that day.

John Longnose of the EA told reporters:

"The place was hummimg. I half expected to see Jeff Goldblum metamorphosising in the corner."

Last night, as a swarm of RSPCA agents moved in to "take care" of the flies, a crestfallen Mr Merde told The Spoof:

"Sacre bleu! Itz incredible. Most of my customers come here for ze flies!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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