Tony Blair has created a highly lifelike 'Blairbot' to help him when he is needed at a highly important meeting and a garden party sponsored by a wine company at the same time.
"I can go to the garden party while my robot goes to the meeting," claims Blair.
However, upon closer inspection of Tony Blair's new machine, it appears to be stuffed full of cloth, and have buttons for eyes. In fact, it appears to be a large scarecrow with a small man inside covered in sticky-tape apart from a small airhole, plus holding poles and standing on stilts to increase height, and also covered in fluff.
"He kidnapped me!" moaned the man upon release.
By this time, Blair was already gone, but police hope to catch the con-man and kidnapper in a week.