Archaeologists have uncovered a Viking ship under a pub car park on Merseyside. This confirms previous theories that British lager is and always has been the best in the world.
It is believed that the Norsemen sailed from the Scandinavian peninsula because they were thirsty, and decided to plunder the Railway Inn in Meols, Wirral, which sells Carling Black Label, the best selling beer in the United Kingdom. However, they had not reckoned on a tarmac car park, and their ship sank under a mass of tar-grouted macadam, where it has lain perfectly preserved until now. Captain Olaf the Stupid is thought to have been responsible for the navigational blunder.
British breweries have been quick to make capital out of the discovery, suggesting that it proves that the Vikings didn't think much of Danish Carlsberg. A spokesman for the British Breweries Association said:
"These Norsemen were clearly connoisseurs of lager and it may even be that the entire Viking invasion of England during the Dark Ages was the result of a search for a high hop flavour and a convivial social atmosphere that simply couldn't be found in continental bistros."
It puts to rest the suggestion that German beer is the best in the world.