Written by Mister Meaner
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Topics: Crime, Taser

Saturday, 1 September 2007

image for Taser Guns Go On Sale At Hamleys
Oh, how toys have moved on these days!

Teenage shoppers who queued for as much as fifteen hours were rewarded this morning when they burst through the doors of a leading toy shop in London to be the first consumers in Britain to be able to buy a Taser.

The electronic stun gun, that delivers a current of 50,000 volts to its victims, has been the subject of much criticism from parents, who say that the weapons could increase the incidence of street crime amongst their otherwise lovely children who are currently 'ever-so-well-behaved'.

Staff at Hamleys in Central London, say the guns, which are available in fluorescent yellow, green and pink, or 'gangsta black', sold out within the first hour of them going on sale, although more have been ordered and are expected to be back on the shelves by Thursday.

Originally available only to the Police in order that they might protect themselves against the public, the Taser has now been deemed suitable for 'anyone that wants one', and retail at a modest £74.99. Other stores such as Toys-R-Us, Debenhams and British Home Stores are also said to be considering stocking them.

Hamleys store manager Betty Cripp, said:

"They've been selling like Hot Cakes! Great Christmas stocking fillers!"

One happy customer flashing his Taser wildly in the faces of passing shoppers outside the store was Stig Burnout of Peckham's Carnage One-Niners, who said:

"Wicked! Electrifying, man! People will respect me proppa now av got meself one o' these Tasers, na mean?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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